Welcome back to Australia: Self Care Style

It wasn’t long ago that I was feeling frazzled, run down, and completely at a loss for the life before me. I mean, looking through the looking glass you’d see a woman in her thirties, a high paying, successful job, fancy SUV, a great senior dog, and a rowdy torti.

What you’d be missing is the stress that this life brings. I have a thankless job. I fight more than I care to. I sleep less than is humane. And I currently drive more miles than I thought was possible. Somehow instead of cutting back on my commute I increased it. Four fold.

I’m exhausted in every sense of the word. I work long hours. I drive long miles. I split my weeks between 2 states, graduate school and specialty medicine. Lately I’ve realized that I need to slow down. I need to DO LESS. And somehow find a way to be okay with it. I’m still working on part A…. And hoping I get to a place with part B. Haha

The start of that is this trip. I booked my trip back to Australia the SECOND I saw that Spring Symposium was held in Port Douglas. I didn’t ask permissions. I just booked it. I registered for the conference straight away. Then I booked the hotel and flights in a matter of minutes. Following the disaster that was my PV trip, I didn’t spare expenses when it came to staying in the hotel of the conference. I also didn’t care about tourist things. I’m here to relax. I’ve snorkeled the Great Barrier Reef. I’ve wandered the Rain Forest. I’ve held a koala – I want to do that one again. But mostly I want my soul to breathe. My mind to relax. My heart rate and stress levels to drop to healthy levels.

See. I already did this part of Australia in 2019 with my bestie. And while I would love to do some of the things she sent me to do…. I just don’t have the energy, or mental and emotional capacity to Jam Pack my trip. I’m here for 11-12 days. But I have classes to sit despite the time change. I have homework and studying to do. I have a conference to attend. And self caring to do.

So yesterday I laid on the beach after checking in. I ate the best burger I’ve had in ages pool side. I drank a fruity cocktail. I read my books. I slept. And I felt peace for the first time in a LONG TIME. It’s sad to think that the last time I felt this at peace was the last time I was here. Is it just because I’m here on vacation? Or is it something more that calls me to Australia?

Today, I slowly got up. Lounged around the room for a few hours, before throwing on some running clothes and hitting the walkways. I figured I’d run along the “beach”…. Only at high tide it doesn’t really exist. I’m not one for wet shows on vacation. So I opted to stick to the walkways of the resort. Essentially my run was a jog through the tropical gardens that surround the resort pools and golf course. It was like taking a run in the rain forest. Only. . . Not.

I showered, went down to breakfast. I forget that in Australia they take the concerns of Gluten Free SO MUCH MORE SERIOUSLY than the States. It’s refreshing to know I’ll be ok here. I chatted with the lobby barista for a hot minute. She was nice. I learned the hotel is at 50% capacity this week. Which makes me incredibly grateful that I’m here now and not in a few weeks when Easter comes and the hotel is anticipated to be at full capacity. A nice easy, QUIET week in a hotel is exactly what I needed. And a little rain forest, koala and sunshine time.

So here I am. Spending gobs of money on a week of peace. And it’s only been 24 hours down under… but I can definitely say that I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be [as my Motivation App keeps telling me]. For the first time I think that app is correct. I am where I need to be. To heal. To refresh. To think… or maybe not think. And just be. I don’t feel life’s unbearable pressures here. But again. I think that maybe just be the false sense that comes with vacation.

What I’m hoping to get out of this trip, or maybe this year. . . is it time to move again? Is it time to start my life living abroad? And if so. I really, really, really need to decide where. I LOVE Australia. Everything about it. But I have yet to be to some of the other places I’ve thought of living. My bestie is bringing new life into this world. Do I want to move further from my future niece or nephew? Do I want to move to another country at all? I don’t know. And right now, here in this space, I’m okay with not knowing what comes next for this girl.

Check back soon for more adventures of the #selfcarevacation #PortDouglasAdultVacationModeSuperSized