A Girl In Search of A Word.

First off let me just say that I’m a SUCKER for EAT.PRAY.LOVE.

I love this movie. I live this movie. Well in a way I live this movie. I would like to take a year off and just search for myself. My bestie is doing that this year… Except the financial aspect plagues us all.

I recently met up with my resident mate. We reminisced over the plagues of life. He’d been out in practice for a little while now. I had just barely started. I already hated working. So did he. The difference being? I highly doubt he has loans.

LOANS. 💸💸💸

The bain of students everywhere.

If I didn’t have those pesky things would my life truly be that different? Would I suddenly find joy in the job I worked SO HARD for? Would I suddenly find life’s meaning? While I can appreciate that the loans are a huge issue but I honestly can’t say that life would be 100% different if I no longer had them. Seeing some of my friends that have paid them off, or paid larger amounts down… they aren’t necessarily free of life’s ups and downs.

So that leaves me to realize that life is… well, just life. It is what we make it. So as I gear up for my next international travel (Heck yes! Another stamp in my passport!) I can’t help but think of my favorite movie.

Eat.Pray.Love was a movie that changed my life. In 2010 I started graduate school abroad. I had just received my passport. I had just started my dream of school, and traveling. I mean what a great experience to do 2 dreams in one.

The living abroad was a bit rough. Just like as any change in life is rough to adjust to. As I look back on those moments I realize I’m not so great with change. I knew it was temporary. So I didn’t get to appreciate the life I had created there until I was on my way out. Much like any other place I’ve traveled to, or lived. I struggle at living for the moment. I’m a nomad in search of a home… but I’m crap at creating the home where I am. At that moment. In that moment.

So it’s time to live for the moment. It’s time to create my own Eat.Pray.Love journey. I’m a girl in search of a word. I used to say my word was NOMAD. But I don’t want that word anymore. I want words like adventurer, traveler, girlfriend, wife, mom to be amongst my words. But the latter 3 are not who I am, they would be descriptors. It’s time to consider what life has waiting for me.

It’s time to find my word.